January Jones – Foxella

September 11, 2020

4 blinds in a row

This alliterate actress who is probably B+ list even though all of you know the name, recently hit up her child's father and got a 40% increase in child support. It is much easier to get those increases when the dad doesn't want his name going public. / This always pretending to be sober A- list singer was actually ordering drinks in public. Guess that shoots down those pregnancy rumors too. / This A+ list country singer/reality star is drinking again. His A list ex will tell you why that is the worst thing in the world. / This east coast Housewife was a drunken mess at a brunch this weekend. She is even worse than she used to be.

June 2, 2020

I’m not sure she has ever dated anyone who was not in a relationship.

This alliterate A-/B+ list actress all of you know is hooking up with yet another married man. I'm not sure she has ever dated anyone who was not in a relationship.

September 29, 2019

He cheated on the actress on an almost daily basis.

I'm sure that this former A list mostly television actor who mostly bombed at movies told his ex wife that an alliterate actress cheated on him. What he probably didn't mention is that he cheated on the actress on an almost daily basis.

July 10, 2019

She met up in the most hush hush of ways with her ex

Twice in the past several months, this alliterate actress all of you know met up in the most hush hush of ways with her ex so he could spend time with his child.

November 11, 2018

3 blinds in a row

The girlfriend of this closeted foreign born permanent A list singer must have read the blinds yesterday about the young model supplied to the singer while on tour because she had a social media meltdown beginning right after the post was published. / Our favorite alliterate B+ list actress recently broke up with a married man who told her he was single. / I kind of joked about it before, but apparently this former A+ list singer turned jam band participant/late night obsession is kind of going a little overboard in his creepiness for this B/B- list actress/celebrity offspring.

July 10, 2018

He likes it that way so he can hook up with her from time to time

Once again, this former B/B- list celebrity who enjoys excess partying has chased away another suitor of his A-/B+ list actress ex all of you know. He likes it that way so he can hook up with her from time to time even though he himself puts no such restrictions on the number of women he nauseates each week.

June 25, 2018

She refused hair, makeup, or wardrobe and said they had five minutes to take the picture.

I have written about the daily struggle that this former A- list mostly television actress from a now defunct hit cable show has faced. That being said, even I can get behind what she recently did. She had a long night of drinking and the next day had an early shoot to get paid a few bucks for a sponsorship deal.

June 24, 2018

He lets her pay all the bills.

This alliterate A- list (but really B+, but she recently bought me a drink, well not specifically me, we were all at a table and she bought the group a drink, so I gave her a little boost to A- for this one blind) mostly television actress says that her now ex who is a former network reality star wannabe actor cheated on the actress on a milestone kind of day for the actress and then completely broke it off for his new love who is a celebrity offspring of a permanent A lister or two.

June 6, 2018

She just won’t go on the record yet because she is scared what happened to the other woman will happen to her.

I love a good bar. I especially love a good open bar. You know who else loves an open bar? This alliterate B+ list mostly television actress. I usually bump her up to A- when we drink because she lets me ask her about things. If I ever see her away from a bar, she is pretty aloof and shy and runs away as fast as she can from anything to do with any kind of talking other than what she is working on.

January 19, 2018

Long time PR person dumped the actress too

This foreign born A- list mostly movie actress was confronted last night about her racist beliefs. This has really been causing issues in her life as it should. That B+ list alliterate actress who loves her beer recently ended their decade long friendship because of it and a long time PR person dumped the actress too.

December 19, 2017

She lost all the weight but now has a much more expensive habit

This B+ list alliteration actress has given up her favorite past time which was drinking beer. She reveled in it. She was also gaining weight so now she is doing coke.

September 22, 2017

She had to drink more than just her usual beer so she was a mess.

I noticed there were a whole lot of before photos of this alliterate B+ list mostly television actress before the drinking began, but none after it started or the end result. She had to drink more than just her usual beer so she was a mess. Combine that with the location and it was just asking for trouble.